Seeing that it is Thanksgiving tomorrow, I thought it would be appropriate-more than appropriate- to list all of the things that I am thankful for. So, let the thankfullness begin!
1. My loving family
2. My beautiful dog
3. My amazing friends
4. Free education
5. Freedom to say whatever I want. To an extent.
6. My own room
7. Toothpaste
8. My green walls
9. My new world map
10. Money
11. My own car
12. My license
13. Facebook
14. The Internet
15. Optimism
16. Guys (you know you love them)
17. The awesome guys that I know
18. Fooooood
19. College
20. Loans and scholarships
21. My camera
22. The moments when guys are the sweetest thing ever.
23. Snow
24. Moments of bliss
25. Skiing
I can think of tons more but it's a long list. So let's just say I'm thankful for everything thats positive and good in the world! Woo-hoo for optimism!
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Snow Nights
As I sit here, pondering my hopes and dreams, I look outside to the frost bitten land.. With a light cover of snow, my backyard looks magical. Ever since I was little I have always wanted to be a marine biologist. It is my passion, besides photography and traveling. I watch documentaries about the ocean on the discovery channel all the time. While most people think it would be boring, I find it exhilerating to know that there is basically a totally different planet on the same planet.
Marine biology is, without a doubt, going to be my future. I'm going to be on a boat with a crew studying the migratory habits of sea turtles. I will travel all around the world, living life to the fullest, and living my dream.
Off to the side when I'm not out at sea, I will own a beautiful, old white farm house that sits over looking the sea with tons of windows. I will have the most wonderful husband who would do anything for me out of love and compassion, and I would do the same for him. He will share my love of travel and wonder of the world.. and we both will travel together and the whole way through life, we will be madly in love.
Marine biology is, without a doubt, going to be my future. I'm going to be on a boat with a crew studying the migratory habits of sea turtles. I will travel all around the world, living life to the fullest, and living my dream.
Off to the side when I'm not out at sea, I will own a beautiful, old white farm house that sits over looking the sea with tons of windows. I will have the most wonderful husband who would do anything for me out of love and compassion, and I would do the same for him. He will share my love of travel and wonder of the world.. and we both will travel together and the whole way through life, we will be madly in love.
But before I get all this, I would travel the world with my soon to be husband, or who knows, maybe I would meet him along the way. Wherever life takes me.. It was meant to happen.
Friday, November 19, 2010
The Geography of Bliss
I'm reading this book called, "The Geography of Bliss" by Eric Weiner and it's about how the author travels to the happiest places in the world and trys to figure out why they are so happy.
I'm about halfway through it and so far he's been to Switzerland, Bhutan, Qatar, and Iceland. The chapter on Bhutan really intrigued me. Its a small, landlocked country in South Asia on the eastern end of the Himalayas. In 2006, "Business Weekly" the magazine, claimed it to be the happiest country in Asia and ranked the 18th happiest country in the world based on a global survey.
I'm about halfway through it and so far he's been to Switzerland, Bhutan, Qatar, and Iceland. The chapter on Bhutan really intrigued me. Its a small, landlocked country in South Asia on the eastern end of the Himalayas. In 2006, "Business Weekly" the magazine, claimed it to be the happiest country in Asia and ranked the 18th happiest country in the world based on a global survey.
The population of 691,141 is made up of mostly Buddhists and Hindus. For centuries it used to be ran under monarchy but recently in 2008, it held its first democratic election. The author Eric, states that Bhutan reminds him of the made up place, Shangri La. If you plan on travelling to the remote country, they have a rule for foreigners; so the country doesn't become populated with tourists, they make you pay $200 a day to have a bhutanese tour guide. The guys are required to wear a gho, a knee-length robe tied at the waist by a cloth belt and the women are required to wear an ankle-length dress called the kira, which is clipped at one shoulder and tied at the waist. If the police catch you without it on, they will fine you.
The country didn't legalize TV until 1999. They feed their pigs marijuana (which makes them have the munchies which makes them eat more, which makes them fatter) and they also believe that penises ward off evil spirits so it is common to see a phallic in a locals house. Fascinating, right?
Bhutan is definetely on my list of places I want to travel to. It seems like such an interesting culture and I'd love to experience it. I need to fork out 200 bucks a day for my own personal tour guide though.. But it could prove to be helpful considering it's a very rural country.
Thursday, November 18, 2010
This is a conundrum.
Oh boy, I feel like this is a high school relationship. But for one, he’s not in high school and two, we arent dating. Soo how does that work? I have no fucking idea. Goodnight!
Negativity Eventually Turns to Positivity
Lately I've been stressed up to my wits with school, cheerleading, and social stuff. It's really putting me into this trance that is the complete opposite of my beliefs. I have been pretty negative lately as to people and myself mostly. All of this stress has made me breakout so much.. This is the worst it has been and it's been like this for atleast a month.. I'm trying not to worry about it too much since worrying about it will only make it worse. But I've caught myself crying over it a few times.. I havent even been able to wear any of my new clothes since my chest is breaking out as well. It totally sucks beyond belief. But I know things could be worse.. and thinking about that makes me feel guilty about complaining.. Which makes me stressed even more. Gah, it's like a never ending cycle of negativity and I really need to break out of it before I become the negativity. Or else it's even harder to get out.
As for my "love life" I don't even have one. No one at school appeals to me. I dont feel the need to dress up anymore because I'm not trying to impress anyone. Sometimes I do.. and partly it's because of my breakout. But other then that, no inspiration whatsoever. And who do I blame that on? The one, the only, Abiel. No one can compare to him and it's pretty sad. If I date someone, it'll feel like I'm "downgrading." And even if I did find someone who was comparable, I would be scared to date him because then Abiel would know and I'd feel like that would be the "okay" for him to date someone too.. I mean it's not like we aren't aloud to date other people.. But I feel that I've been saving myself for him.. and I have a feeling he is for me too. And honestly, I wouldn't know what to do with myself if he started dating someone. I would get insanely jealous, no doubt. But is that aloud? I don't know. I just hope it doesnt happen soon.. Or now. We both have been so bust lately.. We havent talked for like a week and a half. It's seems like an eternity to me.
Ha, after reading over this blog, I have concluded it has been mostly negative stuff. So, to make up for it, I will write a paragraph of positive stuff in my life and how grateful I am for all of it.
I have lovely friends who have helped me out so much these past couple of years and they deserve everything. Thank you. I have a wonderful family who will love me no matter what I say or do and they would do anything for me, no matter what it is. I love them so much, thank you. I get a free education which will benefit me in my future, thank you. I have an amazing guy who, even though lives 3 hours away, still makes me feel like I am apart of his life and someday we will belong to eachother. Thank you. I have my own room finally, after 17 years of sharing a room. Thank you. I am attractive and have a full closet of clothes. Thank you. I normally have a positive outlook on life and I love how my mind thinks. Thank you. I have a beautiful dog who I love oh so much. Thank you. I have a relationship with God and fate that people would kill for. Thank you. I am going to end this positive paragraph with a quote I found on a tea packet I just now opened. It is very appropriate. Thank you fate. And also a picture that inspires me.
"Never utter a wrong word, think a wrong thought, or wish a wrong wish."
I love you, thank you.
As for my "love life" I don't even have one. No one at school appeals to me. I dont feel the need to dress up anymore because I'm not trying to impress anyone. Sometimes I do.. and partly it's because of my breakout. But other then that, no inspiration whatsoever. And who do I blame that on? The one, the only, Abiel. No one can compare to him and it's pretty sad. If I date someone, it'll feel like I'm "downgrading." And even if I did find someone who was comparable, I would be scared to date him because then Abiel would know and I'd feel like that would be the "okay" for him to date someone too.. I mean it's not like we aren't aloud to date other people.. But I feel that I've been saving myself for him.. and I have a feeling he is for me too. And honestly, I wouldn't know what to do with myself if he started dating someone. I would get insanely jealous, no doubt. But is that aloud? I don't know. I just hope it doesnt happen soon.. Or now. We both have been so bust lately.. We havent talked for like a week and a half. It's seems like an eternity to me.
Ha, after reading over this blog, I have concluded it has been mostly negative stuff. So, to make up for it, I will write a paragraph of positive stuff in my life and how grateful I am for all of it.
I have lovely friends who have helped me out so much these past couple of years and they deserve everything. Thank you. I have a wonderful family who will love me no matter what I say or do and they would do anything for me, no matter what it is. I love them so much, thank you. I get a free education which will benefit me in my future, thank you. I have an amazing guy who, even though lives 3 hours away, still makes me feel like I am apart of his life and someday we will belong to eachother. Thank you. I have my own room finally, after 17 years of sharing a room. Thank you. I am attractive and have a full closet of clothes. Thank you. I normally have a positive outlook on life and I love how my mind thinks. Thank you. I have a beautiful dog who I love oh so much. Thank you. I have a relationship with God and fate that people would kill for. Thank you. I am going to end this positive paragraph with a quote I found on a tea packet I just now opened. It is very appropriate. Thank you fate. And also a picture that inspires me.
"Never utter a wrong word, think a wrong thought, or wish a wrong wish."
I love you, thank you.
The Universe Speaks
The strangest but most wonderful thing happened to me today. I was reading my book, Eat Pray Love and it was at the part where she just arrived to India and she was singing her favorite hymn that goes,"I adore the cause of the universe... I adore the one whose eyes are the sun, the moon, and fire... you are everything to me, O god of the gods... This is perfect, that is perfect, if you take the perfect from the perfect, the perfect remains." And then it goes into her meditating and repeating the mantra, "Om Namah Shivaya," which means," I honor the divinity that resides within me."
Now, I'm not huge on religion. I don't go to church, I don't read the bible, and I don't pray every night. I guess you can say I'm a free spirit with religion. I do believe with every fiber of my being that everything happens for a reason, whether it be good or bad. You can call that fate. And I also believe in reincarnation. I'd like to think of myself as a seagull in my past life because one, I have a passion for the ocean, and I can do a very real sounding seagull call, and I want to travel, and seagulls could go anywhere they desire. I have read the book, "The Secret" and I believe in that totally too. If you think positive things, then positive things will happen. The author of that book calls what most people would call God, The Universe. I say God when I talk about my type of religion, just because it's easier and most people know what He is. But I like to think of "my God" as something (not someone) that is in everything and everyone. Not just someone who sits up in the sky. I like to say that I have a pretty close religion with God, even though I don't express my gratitude every single night.
But anyways, I strayed off. After I read to the end of that chapter, I felt something cold plop onto my leg. I jumped and did a quiet shriek. I looked down and I saw a little green tree frog on my leg. I started busting up laughing and then my eyes started to water.. and before I knew it I began to cry. They werent sad tears though, they were tears of joy. I felt something in me light up and I knew the Universe was communicating with me through this tiny frog. I felt pure bliss and joy, it was an incredible feeling to have. I felt like I was in a dream.
I said," I love you" over and over again to the frog and I picked it up. I went over to the mirror to wipe my eyes off and it hopped onto it. I focused my eyesight on the frog, saying I love you again. Then I focused on my reflection and said I love you. I started smiling and crying again expressing my gratitude over and over again, "Thank you, thank you, thank you."
I picked it up and brought it outside. I placed my hand on the grass for it to jump off and as it hopped away, I was smiling to myself still feeling blissful. I knew this was a sign that everything will be alright and everything that I want to happen, will come true. So thank you, and I love you.
Now, I'm not huge on religion. I don't go to church, I don't read the bible, and I don't pray every night. I guess you can say I'm a free spirit with religion. I do believe with every fiber of my being that everything happens for a reason, whether it be good or bad. You can call that fate. And I also believe in reincarnation. I'd like to think of myself as a seagull in my past life because one, I have a passion for the ocean, and I can do a very real sounding seagull call, and I want to travel, and seagulls could go anywhere they desire. I have read the book, "The Secret" and I believe in that totally too. If you think positive things, then positive things will happen. The author of that book calls what most people would call God, The Universe. I say God when I talk about my type of religion, just because it's easier and most people know what He is. But I like to think of "my God" as something (not someone) that is in everything and everyone. Not just someone who sits up in the sky. I like to say that I have a pretty close religion with God, even though I don't express my gratitude every single night.
But anyways, I strayed off. After I read to the end of that chapter, I felt something cold plop onto my leg. I jumped and did a quiet shriek. I looked down and I saw a little green tree frog on my leg. I started busting up laughing and then my eyes started to water.. and before I knew it I began to cry. They werent sad tears though, they were tears of joy. I felt something in me light up and I knew the Universe was communicating with me through this tiny frog. I felt pure bliss and joy, it was an incredible feeling to have. I felt like I was in a dream.
I said," I love you" over and over again to the frog and I picked it up. I went over to the mirror to wipe my eyes off and it hopped onto it. I focused my eyesight on the frog, saying I love you again. Then I focused on my reflection and said I love you. I started smiling and crying again expressing my gratitude over and over again, "Thank you, thank you, thank you."
I picked it up and brought it outside. I placed my hand on the grass for it to jump off and as it hopped away, I was smiling to myself still feeling blissful. I knew this was a sign that everything will be alright and everything that I want to happen, will come true. So thank you, and I love you.
Eat Pray Love
I saw that movie a couple of nights ago and it really got me thinking about what I want to do with my life. It just made me want to travel the world and find myself. She travels to Italy first, and thats where she (I think) learns the lesson about how appearances arent always everything. Then she goes to India and there she brings herself closer to God and balances herself and lastly she travels to Bali to have a medicine man teach her about all he knows and she learns how to open herself to love again. And through all this, everyone has been telling her that it's wrong to not be married, or in other words, it's wrong to be independent. I admire the main character because through it all, she remained independent and traveled to all these places alone on a whim.
Now, I know that since this movie has become popular and everyone has seen it and everyone will probably be saying this so it's a little cliche, but I want to do something like that. I've wanted to do it before I saw the movie, but seeing someone actually doing it made me want to do it even more. I want to go out into the world and experience life and find myself. I want to see and experience who I am without anyone holding me back telling me I can't do this or that.
I am going to buy an italian dictionary and learn the language. Then I am going to go to Italy for a year or so, buy a villa, drink wine, sit on the beach, and eat lots of pasta. I will meet tons of people and make a few close friends. I will take pictures of everyone and everything that makes me laugh, realize something, love, see the truth, grateful, or inspired. Then I will publish all the photos into a scrapbook I have made so I will always remember how I found myself.
It would be awesome if I could travel to other places within the year. Maybe Spain? I can see myself walking through the streets of Barcelona, carrying a basket full of vegetables I have just bought from the local market. Or maybe France? I could see the almighty famous Eifel Tower. Whatever I do or wherever I end up going, it will be an amazing time and an unforgettable adventure.
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